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But really, the biggest value of bringing on a hired gun for your dating life can be summed up pretty easily: “Dating is a numbers game,” says Gershowitz.“We essentially go on bad dates for people.”This date, however, seems to be going well. Sometimes she throws out suggestions for her to veto or accept—“I can’t see you with someone who is slapstick funny”—and sometimes she nods and smiles as Leila fills her in.“Now when I Google them, I’m like, holy crap, there are hundreds of them.” Avgitidis says her clientele has also changed.
Though nobody keeps stats on the topic, matchmaking seems to have simultaneously grown into a niche within this shifting, technology-assisted dating landscape.
Yes-or-no questions about dating specs have somehow evolved into a high-level discussion about life that at one point includes the phrase “We’re all hurtling toward death.”The woman brings up Nora Ephron, who was married three times and considered herself lucky in love. Setting people up effectively requires knowing them to some extent, and knowing people requires time. Kelleher, for instance, charges between ,000 and 0,000 for its year-long memberships. Some companies have tried to hit a balance between automation and human curation.
“I want to be in love 10 times in my life, even if it’s the same person over and over again” she says. I want to know someone the way you know someone when you live with them over many years.”“Well, that’s intimacy,” Gershowitz offers. Automate this process too much, and you’re subbing in an algorithm for the human pixie dust that lends matchmaker-made matches their credibility (“Most apps that are built are built by tech people who really don’t know anything about love,” Kelleher says. A startup called Dating Ring uses an algorithm to surface matches that matchmakers then choose from individually, and instead of face-to-face meetings or phone calls, it uses an instant messaging platform to exchange feedback.
Online dating, meanwhile, transitioned from something most Internet users considered to be a dangerous hobby for cheating spouses to a mainstream activity.
According to a recent Pew study, almost half of the public knows someone who uses online dating or who has met a spouse or partner that way, and one in five adults between the ages of 25 and 34 has participated in online dating themselves.